Boyfriend Refuses To Pay $70K NYU Tuition, Saying ‘I Can Help With $20,000’ — She Calls Him Unsupportive Of Her Dreams

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A man said he refused to pay his girlfriend’s $70,000 annual tuition at New York University after she expected him to fund it entirely, explaining he’d already offered $20,000 toward her studies. The original poster shared his story on the r/AITA_WIBTA_PUBLIC subreddit, saying he’s torn between supporting his girlfriend’s ambitions and protecting his financial future.

Offer Meets Expectation

The OP, 25, who works in tech, said he’s been dating his 22-year-old girlfriend for two years. When they discussed graduate school, he told her, “I can help with $20,000,” believing that amount was generous enough to cover a large share at most state universities.

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But after his girlfriend was accepted into NYU’s master’s program — her “dream school” — she assumed he would pay the full $70,000 tuition, plus living costs in New York. When he reminded her of his earlier limit, she grew upset and accused him of being unsupportive.

Clash Over Finances And Future

According to the post, she argued that NYU would give her access to better opportunities, calling it an “investment in their future.”

The OP said paying the full cost would empty his savings and derail his investments. He explained that while he had spent over $20,000 on his car last year, that didn’t mean he could afford to finance someone else’s degree.

He suggested cheaper schools, community college prerequisites, or student loans they could later repay together — but she dismissed the ideas, insisting that “if he truly supported her dreams, he’d find a way.”

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Reddit Sounds Off On Love And Money

Thousands weighed in on the post, calling the situation a reality check on financial boundaries. “You better not pay for that! That is your girlfriend, not your wife,” one user wrote.

Another Redditor added, “Even if they were married, she’d need to justify that the NYU degree would result in enough future earnings to offset the $100,000 invested in tuition.”

“Seems super entitled to be upset at a $20k gift. Even if it was a sure thing for her future income, it’s not guaranteed they’ll be together,” a different poster wrote.

One commenter summarized the discussion bluntly, saying, “If NYU is going to result in such better outcomes, then getting a loan should be no problem. If she doesn’t agree, maybe NYU isn’t the problem — maybe her ego is.”

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