Women Going Through Menopause Are Sharing The Exact Moment They Knew Something Had Changed With Their Bodies

Menopause is a process undergone by half the population, and yet, so many people know so little about it. Any time I hear something about menopause, it’s like I’m hearing a new piece of information, so I’m definitely of the opinion that women need to talk about this more.

TBS

So, I decided to ask women in the BuzzFeed Community who’ve undergone menopause to share more about what it’s like and tell me about the moment they knew something in their body had changed. Some of their answers were eye-popping, to say the least. So, here are some of the most interesting:

1.“The inability to remember words or describe anything.”

“Sometimes I can visualize what I want to describe, but cannot think of a single word to tell the other person what I’m thinking.

Lack of sleep has been a nightmare, and don’t even get me started on really heavy periods like nothing I’ve experienced before, including gushing so much that a freshly changed tampon and pad can be soaked through 20 minutes later.”

—vpvpvp

2.“The first time I experienced night sweats I thought I had wet the bed, but the wetness was in the shape of my whole body.”

NBC

“I had to sleep with a mattress cover for almost 10 years before they quit.

The hot flashes would soak my upper body, wet my hair, and soak my shirts.I felt betrayed by my body and it tore apart my confidence.”

—christinem20

3.“I’ve got all the horrible effects, but the strangest? My hair is now curly. I have a curl pattern just like my mom’s, with the curl being a degree looser. It’s driving me nuts trying to find the right shampoo and conditioner.”

—cr1stalfairie

4.“I had a panic attack. Never had one before.”

“My heart rate got up to 135 (or something like that) and my blood pressure was high (I have a blood pressure machine at home.) At the time, I was home alone, so I got dressed and was about 10 minutes away from getting myself to the ER, thinking I was having a heart incident.

After 45 minutes or so since the panic attack started, my heart rate and cold flushes finally dissipated. Three days later, I had a telemedicine appointment with my (female) doctor, and she introduced me to ‘perimenopause.’ I was 49 years old at the time.

It’s been quite a roller coaster of symptoms since then. As a side note, my mother had a benign pituitary tumor when I was about 7 years old (my mom was about 30 years old) and after she had the tumor removed, subsequently, she went on synthetic hormones for the rest of her life. So I never knew/witnessed what should’ve been a normal transition into menopause.”

—slyfan787

5.“When my periods started coming every two weeks but were super light, maybe a day or two, instead of the usual seven to 10 days.”

—Anonymous

6.“I started getting symptoms when I was 34. The doctors kept saying that was too young. I told them I’d started getting my periods young, too (around 10 years old), but they didn’t diagnose me with it until I was 38.”

“My first symptoms were a skipped period here and there. And up until that point, I’d only skipped a period while pregnant.My periods were like clockwork. Every 28 days (unless pregnant), five days of heavy flow, two days tapering off until gone. Suddenly, I was having periods every few weeks, lasting 10 days or more. Gross, heavy flow with enormous clots. It was worse than period I had after giving birth. Cramps would cause me to double over.

When I was 39, they finally gave me a Mirena IUD. That was amazing. It took two months to cycle into my body and straighten out my periods. It caused my hot flashes to all but stop (I started having so few I stopped keeping track of them). And a few months later, the spotting stopped.”

—pahz

7.“After giving birth to our first child at 33, I never had a period again. After lots of medical tests, I was told I was in menopause.”

“No amount of hormones would jump-start my body, making it impossible to have another child. Oddly, my identical twin sister went through the same nightmare, even though our mother and older sister went through menopause in their 50s.”

—awfulpony447

8.“Oh lord, where do I start?! Brain fog, anxiety, hot flashes, thinning hair, no libido, mood swings, weight gain, heartburn, muscle aches, no motivation, nausea, migraines and horrible fatigue, and so many more shitty symptoms! It SUCKS.”

—shopoholic66

9.“My intensely irregular, painful, and heavy periods stopped coming. It was a gift from the menstrual gods.”

“Because I had an IUD in, though, I wasn’t sure if it was perimenopause or not. It wasn’t until my face, neck, and chest started to feel like they were on fire that I realized it was happening. My doctor confirmed it, and I’ve been hot-flashing ever since. And let’s not forget the brain fog and inability to fall asleep right away.”

—blabsfrombabs

10.“Weird itchy arms at the crooks, but not due to dry skin.”

“Being utterly exhausted even with sleep and supplements (just vitamins, because I’m not rich enough to have HRT).

My leg hair doesn’t grow as fast, which is super great because it takes forever to shave.

Very intense and lucid sex dreams.”

—ssstege11573

11.“Brain fog is real. I feel like I’ve lost my mind. Whole chunks of memories are just gone. Loss of time and confusion are constant. My coordination and balance are off and it feels like a new puberty phase where I’m bumbling and gangly all over again.”

—lauragipe23

12.“It’s been more gradual for me as opposed to an actual ‘moment,’ but it was hot flashes and night sweats, heartburn out of nowhere, itchy ears, ‘cracking’ bones, and aversions to foods I used to love.”

“Not everything happened all at once and they’ve all continued to change in severity. But it’s ongoing all the time. And it seems like weekly or monthly there are new symptoms or experiences that make me think, ‘WTF is thisss?!’ Basically, it sucks.”

—cnbreedlove

13.“I’m in surgical menopause, so definitely different (and more severe) than going through natural menopause, BUT I was totally unprepared for ‘the change.'”

“Menopause is so much more than just hot flashes, mood swings, and no more period! The decrease in hormones (or total loss in surgical/medical menopause) can affect EVERY SINGLE organ, system, and bodily function. HRT, which can offer relief from short and long-term symptoms of menopause, has been almost demonized as a ‘bad’ treatment option due to inaccurate information.

Also, testosterone (a hormone that women DO produce before menopause) is NEVER covered by insurance, again because of outdated information!”

—georgiajaymes

14.“It hurt to walk. I don’t mean my legs, knees, or anything below my pelvis. My *labia* hurt, and the entryway to my vagina (which is called the vestibule, did you know?) felt as if someone had put sandpaper in my underwear.”

“Just fucking friction plus less estrogen-produced moisture, y’all! I thought perimenopausal vaginal dryness would be a thing during sex (and it is), but  assumed we’d use lube or something. But the pain just from moving my body hither and yon…that’s definitely not how I used to be!

Thank heck it’s treatable, soo easy and effective I almost forget the maintenance doses these days. Talk to a doctor, my sweet girls. And don’t take ‘deal with it’ for an answer. ❤️”

—Anonymous

15.“I was 50 1/2 years old at the time. No pre-menopause symptoms except hot flashes. While taking a shower one day I felt something soft hit my foot.”

NBC

“At first I thought it was a spider and was terrified to look down. When I finally did, I saw a huge mass of blood about the size of my palm on the floor of the shower. Needless to say, I was horrified. By the time I got over the shock and bent down to look more closely, it had started to disintegrate from the water.

My husband took me to the emergency room because I’d started hemorrhaging blood at a rapid rate. It didn’t hurt or anything, but I am anemic, so all that blood was concerning. The ER just said it was due to menopause and to follow up with my PCP. I saw her a week later, and she just laughed, saying, ‘Yep, those clot babies can be scary!’

Six months later, I had a uterine ablation, which failed after two years, and I started having periods again. I was given one of those hormone tests and was told I was fully capable of getting pregnant. I finally reached full menopause nine months ago, shortly before my 58th birthday.”

—Anonymous

16.“It was when I realized why I was having trouble staying asleep at night. I thought it was just the stress I was going through at the time, and that waking up soaked in sweat was from bad dreams.”

“Once the stress was no longer around, I was looking forward to having a full night’s sleep; however, my body decided that wasn’t going to happen. Now, if I can get a collective four hours of sleep in a night, I consider it a good thing. Night sweats suck horribly!”

—Anonymous

17.“I felt like I had a UTI all the time, but I didn’t. Constant tests. Constant doctor’s appointments. Constant antibiotics. False diagnoses.”

“Not one single doctor thought this 48-year old-woman needed vaginal estrogen. I had to figure it out myself and ask (beg) for it from a doctor who would listen. I haven’t had a bladder issue since I started using it. It’s appalling what women are going through in 2025 without any knowledge or help from the medical community.”

—Anonymous

18.“I had an IUD for five years. Apparently, I passed through menopause while I had the IUD and the meds helped me through menopause without even knowing it. When my IUD was removed, I had a blood test and it showed that I was post-menopausal. I’ve had one hot flash, although I still have issues with night sweats if I have too much sugar.”

—Anonymous

19.“I discovered I was going through menopause six months ago, when my hormone levels tested at 8.5. Apparently, I’m already halfway through this transition. It was my partner’s thoughtful questions that led me to this realization. His concern prompted me to seek answers, as I had initially brushed off my symptoms as normal.”

“Living with PTSD, CPTSD, cancer, and low confidence made it challenging to distinguish menopause symptoms from my existing conditions. However, I’ve noticed a significant increase in anxiety, sweating, mood swings, and forgetfulness. Even my libido has decreased, which I initially attributed to my severe depression.

Another unexpected symptom is the stubborn 10-pound weight gain in my midsection. Despite trying various supplements, I’m still searching for relief from these symptoms.

This journey has taught me that menopause affects not only our physical bodies but also our inner self. I’m grateful for my partner’s support, which helped me confront this new chapter head-on.”

—Anonymous

20.And finally: “I ran out of birth control and so I stopped after many years of taking it. One day I thought I had the flu because I felt feverish, but I never spiked a fever. It was the day my LEGS felt like they had caught fire inside my jeans that I realized what was going on. I was 39. I never got another period; I was not expecting that!”

—Anonymous

…I think if I was World Monarch I would be dumping about 50% of my government’s revenue into medical research for women. But enough about me — what are your thoughts?! Tell me about them down below.

If you have your own menopause experience you’d like to share, I’d love to hear about it! Or, if you have something to say but prefer to stay anonymous, feel free to write into this anonymous Google form. Who knows — your experience could be included in a future BuzzFeed article!

Note: Some comments have been edited for length and/or clarity.